I have not blogged recently. Life has been a bit hectic.
First we were mourning the loss of the twins. I will post pictures. We went to the ultrasound appointment in California on Thursday, November 18Th. The plan was to spend the night there, meet Justine (birth mom), see the ultrasound, and head home.
We did that, but it was not as expected.
On Thursday we met with Addie (birth grandma) in the morning. She told us that Justine had been to the doctor the day before and all looked well except that she was contracting nearly constantly and was dilated to 1 CM. We spend a large portion of the day at Justine's grandmother's house. She was on house arrest there.
We arrived at the appointment on time and sat in the waiting room and visited Isabelle had an instant bond with Justine and was talking her ear off. When it was Justine's turn they allowed Addie and me (Sara) to go in, but not Isabelle or Daryl. Justine promised Isabelle that she would bring her pictures of her brothers. She was 2 pounds heavier than the previous appointment. Then came the ultrasound, and there were no heartbeats.
We were stunned. I honestly feel that the doctor saw a chance to "allow" the babies to "expire" to avoid having more welfare babies. (He did not know that we were adopting them.) Justine was devastated. The doctors did not take any immediate action. For the rest of the day I watched as her hand would start to rest on her abdomen and then a look of realization would come over her face and she would begin to cry.
When we walked out of the room, Daryl and Isabelle were waiting for us. Isabelle immediately asked "Where's my pictures of my brothers?" Justine couldn't handle it and went outside while I sat down and tried to explain to Isabelle that the babies had died.When we went outside Isabelle went up to Justine and said "See my brothers are here!" and touched her belly.
We decided to go to St. John's Hospital for a second opinion, but Addie told us it would be best to head home, so we did. On the way home, I cried a lot. At one point Isabelle woke up and said, "Mommy, I'm sad that my brothers died." I said, "I am too." She said, "Do all brothers and sisters die?"
We spent most of the weekend holed up in our house. I know that to most people it may seem silly to mourn a pregnancy that was ours only in verbal agreement, but it is very real. On Saturday we were sent pictures of the boys by text message. The boys had tangled their umbilical cords and cut off the blood flow. Daryl attempted to go to work, but was sent home on Saturday evening for the remainder of his shift.
We became a licensed foster family on November 10Th. While we were at the ultrasound appointment we received our first call for a potential foster placement, but turned it down. We were just starting to get adjusted when we got a phone call about two boys, ages 1 and 3, who needed a placement. It is so funny that God had us preparing for a 2 little boys all this time, and even though it didn't happen the way we thought that it would, He had it perfectly orchestrated.
